It can be very easy to be loyal to a person or a cause when everything is going well. We have an incredible capacity to look at things through rose colored lenses, in the romantic light of emotion or the adrenaline rush of the moment. But things very rarely continue in that way. And when the tint has rubbed off your lenses, or when the emotions are gone or when the adrenaline has died down, what then? Loyalty is tested during adversity and opposition. It is easy to stand by someone when the sun is shining and a cool breeze is blowing. If the audience is positive, support the show by all means. But what about when that person's cause necessitates them to stand out in the pouring rain? What about when thunder shakes the ground and lightening flashes across the sky? What about when the crowd throws stones instead of roses?
I can remember my emotions after an unfortunate event last November. Not to be all political or anything but hey, this is my blog! :) I love my country. I love what she stands for (or stood for), for the rich, godly heritage she possesses, for the bravery of men and women who have laid down their lives to protect the freedoms that she offered to hard working, honest people. Yes, I love my country. That said, I fear my government. And in recent years, long before President Obama, the American government has gotten out of hand. We have representatives who represent themselves instead of the people, an activist judiciary system, politicians who are bought out right and left. . .I could go on. I would never incite a rebellion, but I have always said that if a just rebellion began, I would not hesitate to take up arms and to fight in it. That's what I said. Then November came. I was crushed, physically, mentally, spiritually. At that point I truly believed that there was going to be a revolution. For the first time, I was faced with the possibility of having to eat my words. What if something did happen? How loyal to my principles and my word would I be then? Was I really willing to fight for my liberty and constitution? Was I ready to defend them in order to preserve them for future generations? Would I really rather die fighting to be free than live under the tyranny of another? So far, that hasn't been tested yet. But I'm pretty sure my answer is "yes."
I look forward into the future. One day, I may have this same question facing me in a relationship. I'm sure it will be easy to stand by my husband when life together is new and fresh and we're still "in love." But what about when it's been a few years and things aren't quite as new and fresh as they once were? What about when God is calling him down a road that I don't particularly want to go on? What about when his vision pushes me out of my comfort zone? What about when he's outright wrong and has a lousy attitude? How will my vows and commitment hold up when my pride is hurt or when I disagree? Will I be able to stand by the man that God has given me then? I pray that He gives me the strength and the humility in that moment to say emphatically, "yes."
But such things must be practiced. God gives us small portions. He will not entrust us with a kingdom if we cannot first rule our own house.
So here's the scenario: I have always told the Lord that I would go wherever He sends me. But what if He sends me somewhere wholly different than I was expecting? Would I be willing to truly leave my life in His hands, not only my heart but my physical being also? Will I continue to follow Him even if the risk is high? He has given me the strength to say "yes" in this moment. I believe that He will give me the strength for future moments and the wisdom for future decisions.
Jesus, today I confess to You all of my presuppositions about life, my plans and my misgivings. I lay them before the cross and repent of holding onto rights that never really belonged to me in the first place. You are sovereign, Lord. In light of who You are and all You've done in my life, I choose, in this moment to surrender to You. My only desire is to be used of You. Have Your will and Your way in my life, Lord. Do what You want in me and through me. Wherever You send me, God, I will go.
Shape me into a vessel of honor that is fit for Your service, pouring out only what has been poured in. Thank You for being willing to take broken, weak vessels like me and reshape and remake me into something useful. It truly is a work of transformation.
"But none of these things move me; nor do I count my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my race with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God." Acts 20:24
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